Friday, September 15, 2006

DEMOCRATS STILL DON’T GET IT! and some Republicans lack common sense. . .

Big debate over how we treat captured terrorists. Democrats very concerned about how foreign nations view American policies, and a few idiot Republicans self-righteously taking the high road, going to earn the world’s good opinion.

“Gee, mom, everybody else does it.” If everybody else jumped off Brooklyn Bridge, would you do it, too?

Where are your heads? Never mind. We’ve got a pretty good idea.

Listen up, fellas. Look into the nearest mirror and repeat after me: “My job is to take care of America and the American people.”

Next: “The American people don’t care what those foreign nations think. They just want to be safe.”

Next: “The American people know the difference between soldiers in uniform and terrorists who capture and torture their prisoners, then dump them beside the road.”

Next: “The American people know that our side needs interrogation ability to keep us safe at home, and that Congress is keeping us from getting it.”

Next: “There’s an election coming up. And after that, there’s another one, and another one.”

Next: “I’d better start paying attention to what the American people think.”

Common sense tells us that we don’t want to mess with the international laws that keep our uniformed military safe if captured. However, there’s nothing in the world to keep us from writing new legislation, defining terrorists and what we can do when we capture them, and grandfathering in the ones we already have. We can certainly define the threat to America, and why we have to do what we have to do. We can detail the atrocities these terrorist commit, and their goals and aims that put them outside the normal bounds, and the fact that they belong to no country, no government, no uniformed service, and answer to no leader, with no rules. We can limit ourselves and require that they do the same, but recognize that they may not. We can also state that they are not citizens of America or any other particular country, and have declared Jihad, and are thus subject to the rules of their own Jihad, and are not, when captured, granted the rights of citizenship in the country they would destroy.

This solves the problem by documenting the class which they themselves have created for themselves. It is they who have removed themselves from civilization, not we have have removed them. They created their own special class of rights, within Jihad – which does not authorize the peculiar brand of torture which they employ. They blaspheme their own religion; and we sully freedom when we offer its benefits to those who are undeserving of it.

It’s time all of you stopped thinking of your political gain and started thinking of what is best for the people you represent. America was more respected when Roosevelt sent the marines after that American than it was before 9/11, and it is more respected today. If you want to know what caused the “poor opinion” of America held by many in the world, you have only to look to the media, and to the shenanigans they report, to their negative stories, to the leaks from your ranks, to the disrespect you show to the President, to the country, and to us, to find out why there is so much negative opinon.

And another thing, didn’t your mother ever tell you you can’t buy friends? Bring our money home. All of those creeps in Cuba, taking our money and throwing stones, should convince you that we’ve done enough. Bring our money home. Pass an act defining the terrorists, terrorism, and giving our interrogators what the President says they need. Do your jobs.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Death of a Film Maker

Wow! Far out! Just saw this great new script.
Action like you wouldn’t believe. Terror! The hair stood up all over my body.

See there’s this filmmaker – he makes this rad film about the death of a president, but it’s a live President. Just a film, you know, just talking – didn’t mean anything by it – the guy’s just out to make a buck, you know.

BUT. He makes these guys really mad. I mean like frothing at the mouth. You see, they like this President, and they think he’s like keeping the world safe for democracy or something, and they think this guy might like stir up trouble for the Pres.

SO they decide to take out this film maker.

Really. I kid you not!

Man, it’s a great script!
They track this guy like all over.
And like they decide it’s not enough just to kill him.

No. They want to like make a statement first.

So they decide to do a film too of all their action like while they’re tracking and all. Like while they’re setting up and freaking the guy out and all?

Oh, so cool man. Like rad, you know?

Great action. Like you know those really great vid games. Like HOT action and you would not believe everything that happens to this guy. Like they decide to totally freak him and everybody else out first. Before they kill him, I mean.

And boy what they do to him.

Bet this one wins a prize.